In Lou We Trust

To be quite honest, I'm not really "feeling it" for tomorrow's game against Our Hated Rivals. The Devils have played very poorly against the Penguins and while the team is gearing up against for tomorrow - notably Sutter yelling at Andy Greene's lack of positional defense and sadly without Jay Pandolfo - there's not a whole lot of positive feeling going into this one. Schnookie hates the Devils now for their recent play and wishes them mild irritation after mild irritation. However, we (as in you, the reader, and me, the writer) are not miserable pessimists - unless, uh, you are one, then, um, I'm sorry? Let me try again. We are not proverbial shoe gazing hopeless people. We are fans. Of the Devils. And what fans do is cheer on their favorite team, especially against playing hated rivals known for their epic and comical failure.

So in that vein, in conjunction from driving home late from work with silly thoughts in my heads, I have some suggestions to provide some new dynamic chants stating that the Rangers suck. You will hear the old standby about 30 times at The Rock tomorrow, but considering it's based on a Rangers chant - I think some alternatives are in order. Namely, for the benefit of those who hate the Rangers so much, they don't want to associate themselves with any similar chants.

• "We hate the Rangers, we do. We hate the Rangers, we do. We hate the Rangers, we do. Rangers, we hate you!" (thanks RBN)
  
• "Oh oh ooooohhhhh. Oh oh ohhh. Oh oh oooohhhh. The Rangers Suck." (to the tune of You Got It by New Kids on the Block, dancing optional).
• "You can't start a fire, you can't start a fire without a spark. This game's for us, cause the Rangers completely suck." (to the tune of Bruce Springsteen's Dancing in the Dark)
• It's the Rangers, it'll always be never. Cause they'll never be winners. I just want to the Devils to triumph toniiiiiiight - THE RANGERS SUCK" (to the tune of Bon Jovi's It's My Life)
• Only for leads: "We have [number of Devils goals] and you have [number of Rangers goals]. Doo dah, doo dah. We have [number of Devils goals] and you have [number of Rangers goals]. Doo dah. Keenan's in Calgaaaary and Messier can't save you now. We have [number of Devils goals] and you have [number of Rangers goals]! Oh, the doo dah day!"
• "Three are better than One!" (repeat)
• If the Rangers are losing, "You retire another number! When you actually won something! Then you try to retire another! POP GOES THE SEASON" (to the tune of Pop Goes the Weasel).
• "Henrik Lundqvist. WOOOOOOAAAH. He had potential. WOOOOOAAAAAH. Then he lost it. WOOOOOOOOOAH. And the Rangers lost again. WOOOOOOAAAAAH-YEAH"
• "Hey Shanny/Gomez! You gotta go go go go goodbye glad to see you go go go go goodbye!" (to the tune of The Ramones' Glad to See You Go)
• "Devils get up now! (Get on up) Get up! (Get on up) Get on the scene! Beat the Rangers like it's obscene!" (to the tune of James Brown's Sex Machine)
• "Rangers Suck! They fail to win what they need to continue failing to get what they want" - a play off of Hot Pants' full title, also by James Brown.
• "The Rangers want it all but you can't have it! It's in our hearts but you can't buy it! What is it? It's it! What is it? It's it!" (to the tune of Faith No More's Epic).
  

Let's get excited - feel free to contribute some more in the comments. I'll be expecting to hear none of these tomorrow! Go Devils!